On winning

I passed – wheeeee!!!

🙂 🙂 🙂

I don’t know how well I won, but I think it’s the winning part that counts.
Now to catch up on lost sleep 🙂
(And later, on lost (/missing) posts)

On missing my Ks

I use various instant messaging apps on my phone. Just now, I opened one, and all the Ks were missing, from all the words.

Just imagine a world with no Ks.
Edit: my brother says that it was very k-less of me to lose them…

On green cards, chocolate and a small flashing light

That very short list just about covers the things I’m living for at the moment.

The stacks of carefully written green and blue cards prove I’m revising, the chocolate provides motivation to carry on writing, and the small flashing light makes me smile as it blinks to tell me someone’s written to me.

On rainbows and double ended candle burning

I’m trying to finish my ‘book’* before Saturday evening. Or at the very very latest by Sunday morning. That would mean I can send it off to be printed before I go on holiday. ‘Holiday’ is used in the loosest form here – it’s more a chance to revise ALL the things than a chance to relax.

But anyway.

Book.

It’s taking me considerably longer than I expected and I have been distracted considerably more than I’d hoped.

Most, but not all, of it self inflicted distraction [obviously]. Things like vacuuming the house or hanging out washing or putting up Christmas lights. Things like new fish and new filters and borrowed dogs and fish illnesses. Things like friends and Committee Meetings, and Forum-riots, and birthday travellings. Things like life.

I have written hideously long emails and forum entries instead of reading my course books, and spent time on the phone instead of on the computer.

I have started sorting my unruly collection of photos, instead of taking the ones I need and ignoring the rest.

I have even watched useless programmes on TV instead of revising or proof reading.

On the other hand, after several years of dossing**, my computer objects violently to having to work so hard, and crashes my writing programme every so often – just to make me appreciate its hard hard life. My brother helped pacify it, but it’s still not totally happy.

Rewriting or reformatting the same thing multiple times can make one mutter things like, “well isn’t that irritating”….

***

I have to work during the day and I have school every other evening during the week and at weekends, so when it comes to doing things I want to do, I’m left with lots of scraps of time squished between all the other things. Lots of those scraps are either too small to use, or occur when I’m nowhere near my computer.

Neither schools nor work is prepared to go away and let me write, so the answer is [obviously] to write at night when I would normally be asleep.

That’s not necessarily a problem – ​I work well, probably even my best, at night.

The problem is, I don’t work well at work if I’ve worked well at night.

I don’t even work well at getting up when I’ve worked well at night.

Not that getting up was ever easy. I’m not a morning person at the best of times, and when I’ve slept an average of 5 hours a night for a week or two, I am decidedly less so.

I can’t function at work without sleep and I can’t function at writing without work (to keep me in chocolate and heating). I can’t function at sleeping when I know I won’t finish writing in time.

Vicious circle?

Maybe. Maybe I’m just stretching the bow a little too far (German expression).

Maybe, hopefully, if I stretch it just right, it can be like a rainbow, and I’ll find there’s a pot of something sparkly at the end of it..

In the meantime, I’ll look more closely at all the colours emerging from the grey fog in my head.

Luckily DB is prepared to cook for me.

Luckily my colleagues understand  (a bit) when I’m unfocused.

Luckily I’m almost (!) finished with the book.

Luckily it’s almost Sunday.

Luckily I have ten days of recovery (and revision)*** in a warm country to look forward to.

Luckily I have the luxury of choice, even if things seem unchangeable.

* book = a project I’m working on for my grandparents

** nothing to do with MSDOS

*** R&R ??? 😉

On not talking about Christmas

It’s the 25th of November.

That makes it exactly a month until Christmas.

I am ignoring that, and all other Christmas related things.

Between now and then, I have:

4 exams to revise for

a book to finish compiling and find pictures for and format and send off in time for printing

3 aquariums to look after, including water changes, getting rid of the duckweed and reinstalling a pump/filter

a 10 day holiday which DB wants to cancel because I’m planning on revising through it and he thinks staying here and working is more efficient…

I think I might not acknowledge that Christmas is even a thing until the 23rd when I will already be on the way home, and passed caring too much.

On forgetting my own BlogDay :(

I didn’t write anything yesterday. I went to bed at 7:30 with a headache instead.

Yesterday was the 23rd of November 2016.

I started writing here on 23rd of November 2012.

That means the blog turned 4, and I didn’t even acknowledge it :(.

Luckily Claudette came to the rescue and congratulated it for me..

Thank you 🙂

***

4 years are a long time, but also not very long.

It’s gone fast, but also very slowly.

I am the same, but also very different.

My writing’s changed (a bit), but my subjects haven’t changed (much).

My blog hasn’t changed (much) since then, but my knowledge has (a lot). Since then I have made a very basic website for DB’s company, a very basic website for my molecules, and started to make one for a committee I’m part of, until they decided they didn’t think it was necessary to inform anyone about what they do. I have tested adding forums and making comment forms and polls and making page templates and even tried a tiny bit of code (which I have abandoned for some time in the future when I have more than a handful of spare minutes).

I am nowhere near close to being ‘good’ at making websites, but I am getting ‘better’. I noticed how much time I must’ve spent on here over the years when I was writing to a group of people yesterday who are trying to create a website, and having most of them think I was talking about flying to the moon when I used words like WordPress or themes or PlugIn or WordFence or multiple editors or posting-by-email.

Here’s to the next four(+) years and the next part of the learning curve :).

Incidentally, I wrote 444 posts in those 4 years.

On writing it out

– or “don’t write back in anger”

(Written yesterday; I fell asleep in the middle if the last sentence..)

Yesterday (Monday) I was mad at a situation involving several people and several opinions.

Today (Tuesday), I wrote them all an email. It took me a good part of the morning to get it into something that I could send, but work was out of the question as long as I was still cross. Glass, hard and brittle as it is, is very susceptible to feelings.

***

I took a copy to my favourite secretary to proof read for me. I needed to know if it was still too aggressive for posting. She asked lots of questions about the situation in general, and pronounced my email adequate for the circumstances.

I left it for a while, and when I came back to it and reread it, it made more sense read backwards, so I changed it round a bit, added a couple of new sentences, took out others and pressed send.

Finally it was gone, and with it, most of my anger.

***

I am now a whole lot calmer, and no longer feel the need for pointy instruments or punching bags.

I read the mail to DB when I got home. he said he wouldnt have been able to write it as well, and he’s German. 🙂

***

So far I have received two (or three if you count two from the same person separately) emails from people who support me, my plan, my ideas and my way of getting stroppy while staying mostly neutral.

I think this might be the way forward. (Loud music – sleep – writing)

Advanced warning

Baby-Essay is finished and handed in. Presentation has been presented.

I now have excess writing capacity and two months of repressed ideas – you have been warned  🙂

On writing my fingers to the boneskin

I have “Daumenknochenhautentzündung”.

“Thumb bone skin inflammation” sounds pretty impressive, but German is a whole lot cooler :). I think the Latin is periostitis but I may well be wrong.

I didn’t know that was even a thing until yesterday, I just knew my thumb hurt.

Apparently, all bones are covered with a very thin, very delicate layer of “skin” responsible for connecting them to the ligaments and nerves and blood supply and who knows what (ask someone medical). If you repeatedly bash a part of your body where the bone is close to the surface (like your shin, or your fingers) there’s not enough flesh to cushion the impact, and you run the risk of damaging the aforementioned boneskin (which presumeably has a fancy Latin name like periost).

According to the internet, this kind of damage is generally caused by running in the wrong shoes.

According to my doctor, it can also be caused by writing too much. The repeated pressure of holding a pen, when you aren’t used to it, is enough to disturb the boneskin. Seems there was a reason behind my year 2 teacher’s constant critisism of how tightly I held (and still hold) “writing implements”.

My thumb, the one that hurt when I wrote all those revision cards, is suffering from accute Daumenknochenhautentzündung. That basically means it really hurts and I shouldn’t use it for a week or so.

Be warned.

🙂

 

On who I am and where I’m going.

That’s approximately the first assignment in the zero to hero series. Most of the info is known to the people who read my ramblings regularly, but putting it all in one post seemed like an easy post 😉

I am:
– 27 years old
– a glass blower
– a girlfriend to the bestest DB
– English
– a German speaker
– the oldest and shortest of three children
– a Christian
– a stone thrower
– Jesskawrites…..
…….and this is my blog about not throwing stones (and occasionally about glass or snow or any number of unrelated other things).

I’m going:
– to spend the weekend skiing
– to move to Berlin when I get back
– to use moving house as THE opportunity to become an organised person 😉
– to resit my practical glassblowing exam at the end of January
– to paint my entire flat before I can move out, collecting something like £1000 as I go past my landlady
– to start work in February
– to learn to drive at some point after that
– to [hopefully] set up a company making small Glass Things
– to write more often.